Emily Perry Studios

worthiness, nonviolence & lovingkindness

this week, brené over at ordinary courage is hosting a week of worthiness to celebrate the release of her new DVD.  she really got me thinking about the idea of worth, and how it impacts our lives.  and while there is much to be said about self-worth in terms of self-care [am i worth spending the money on? am i worth the time?], there is also an aspect of worth that ties into our daily internal dialogue.

in buddhism and yoga, non-violence is referred to as ahimsa.  ahimsa refers not only to physical violence, but mental and emotional violence as well. when we doubt ourselves, when our internal tapes repeat messages about our unworthiness, this is a form of violence towards the self.  when we say to ourselves "i will be worth it when..." , this is in fact an act against the self as we are right now.  it is great to have goals and visions of who we want to be and become, but we don't need to pay the price now by beating ourselves up.  because, as we all know, when we do get to the "destination", often that is never enough either, and we are left striving for a state a being that is beyond reach.  we deserve to find happiness now, right in this moment.  we don't need to achieve anything to get there. 

part of our practice, as humans and creatives, is to shut this cycle down.  when you come up against internal resistance and messaging about self-worth, ask yourself, "am i practicing ahimsa?"  am i practicing loving-kindness (metta) towards myself?  a peaceful life and world starts with our internal world.  if we are not at peace, our world cannot be at peace.  if we cannot be kind to ourselves, and love ourselves fully as we are in this moment, then how can we practice authentic kindness and  love with another?

so as you can see, for me, this idea of worth comes back to a sense of loving-kindness (or metta) and non-violence towards the self.  how are you going to celebrate this week of worthiness?

on tapas

late last night i was reading, and trying to get a plan together to get some writing done during this move.  i have a feeling it is totally unrealistic, but when you have three ideas for articles that will not leave you alone, you know it is a good idea to get them down and work them out.  and yet- when i have so much on my plate at once- things can come to a stand still for me.

and then i started reading about tapas.  in yoga, tapas is the intensity or drive that we bring to things.  it is the engine, so to speak, that propels us into action.  in our lives, so many of us are driven, and are going non-stop- but to what end?  i want to use tapas to fan the flames of a healthy, balanced life- not to drive myself into a state of burnout.  through this reading i realized that i may need to save all my drive and intensity for the moving process- and save the work projects for april.

there is a healthy way to engage our lives so that we are motivated and pro-active while maintaining a sense of being grounded.  Bo Forbes mentions in this great article, that the way to accomplish this is with our intention.  Forbes states that it is our intention, or sankalpa, which "acts as a guiding sutra, or "thread," that we weave throughout our yoga practice, on and off the mat."  i could not have said this more beautifully.  it is our sankalpa which gives us direction, and acts as a reminder of what is at the heart of all this activity in our lives.

i am working on applying these ideas to my everyday life.  what for me is just busy activity, and not rooted by my intention?  what activity keeps me from being present and calm, and what really is steering me towards my goals?  i would love to hear how these ideas apply to your life right now.

{for more on tapas, there is more great insight here and here}

moving house

ah, so it looks like our family is moving. 

we will be moving to the next town over, to another beach house.  and so we only have a few weeks left at the place we call sea ranch.

 

things we have learned here, in no particular order:

• how to quickly start a fire in the wood stove
• that great horned owls love to duet
• that orion protects our house in winter
• how the plants, birds, sea and stars change with the seasons
• how to bike without training wheels
• how to climb the pines
• how the swallows return in spring
• the way the seabirds follow schools of fish
• the way the dolphins come play in summer and fall

 

our new house is just a bit north, up the coast.  i cannot wait to see what it holds for us!

  

birthday

{cupcakes at our friend's party for her little boy, a few weeks ago...}

today is my 36th birthday, which is less momentous than 35 was, i must say.  we might get some gelato or ice cream, you know, for the kids.  

in terms of birthday wishes, my only one is that you might give a little here:: to Myriam's Haiti fund for the schools her family works with that were totally destroyed (you can read more about it and donate here).  i am sure you have already given to Haitian relief, but if not, here is another opportunity for you.

i think this is going to be a really good year... really good!
 

a little bit of drawing...

one of the things i had been thinking about over the last year is my desire to get comfortable drawing.  i am not so much interested in rendering things a certain way, just my way but better.  i want to be able to draw whatever i want and not feel hampered.  

see, here's my dirty little secret:: even though i have had photo courses since eighth grade, and a few painting classes here and there, i have never really tried to draw things.  and with the illustration scene taking off online over the last four years, i have been felling like i want to be able to do a little of that.  just a little.

i bought The Creative License by Danny Gregory, and it was just what i was looking for.  not a drawing book, but a new way of seeing and  living creatively book.  i think it was written just for me.

big sky mind (stupa #2), 2010

i think i mentioned a couple of days ago how I figured out how to get some effects i want (i heart sandpaper!):: this is the result.  if you paint, maybe try something entirely new with what you have:: scrape it, sand it, wet it.  you never know what will happen.

 

Welcoming the New Year:: Vision Mapping

so, i had my big list, but i was still needed to sort of "tie together" all of different things i like to do.  when you are trying to pioneer a new business i think it helps to have a vision of how everything is connected and feeds the other part.

after reading gwen bell's post, i knew i had to make a little vision map.  now this map doesn't include my home life, parenting, being-a-wife-stuff, because what i really need to figure out is how all of the things i love to do feed into my studio project.  so here is version 1.0 of the map:

 
:::

i bet this looks a little chaotic, but it has helped.  i am still working on it, and i plan on making a final watercolor version i can post on the wall, scan and carry around with my planning calender.  when i set my goals of the year, and map out the schedule for those goals, i want to be able to see what areas i am hitting or ignoring.

::

what does your vision map look like?  Post your link in the comments!

Welcoming The New Year:: The Vision List

are you getting ready for the new year?  besides all the usual house cleaning and what-not, i am planning for the year, and i thought i would share my process here.

the first step for me is my vision list.  this is my master list of things i want to explore for the year, what i want to focus on.  i have items in several categories, some of which may overlap categories.  my master categories are:

home, kids, art, business, personal & fitness, writing, to get/ purchase.

i also have a big vision list, that pulls from all the categories:

1. launch the workshop
2. work on etsy shop and selling
3. do a retreat
4. submit work for shows:: to show at 3 places
5. submit three articles for magazines
6. finish book proposal and send to agents
7. try encaustic
8. shoot pics everyday, and go on specific shooting trips
9. draw
10. develop product line

what is on your big vision list for the year?

the holidays are here!

well, we are in the thick of the holidays over here: i've got one kid with a cold, one with tons of energy, and still a lot to get done before friday.

 

so it may be quiet here for a few days as we catapult ourselves into the season: complete with the ballet, Bear Noel, and seasonal parties... i am looking into some more environmentally friendly holiday wrapping ideas, and baking cookies to fuel us... 

what are your tricks for getting through the season? 

encaustic techniques

so, lately i have been eyeing encaustic supplies, and i came across some great little videos by Blick. now i just need to find a palette...